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Man sitting next to her turns to her and says, "Lady, that is the ugliest baby I have ever seen. "'' Orange you glad I didn't say banana'' Old man comes into a restaurant, sits at his usual table, and orders the usual — matzoh ball soup. " "No." The waiter calls for the maitre d', and for the chef, and each goes through the same routine: "Too hot? " "No, no no."Finally the chief, at his wits end, says, "Sir, I will taste the soup myself. "The librarian hands over a a couple of slim children's paperbacks, and watches the chicken as it leaves the library, walks across the street, through a field, and disappears down the hill. Walks right up to the librarian, drops the books on her desk, and says, "Book, Book, BOOK, BOOK! They are all asked the same question: "When you are in your casket, and friends and family are mourning over you, what would you like to hear them say about you? " To which he replied, "I know - I already got that side." After dying in an accident, three friends go to Heaven for orientation."What he did is totally unacceptable on this train. " the waiter asks."I can't eat this soup," the man replies. On a rock on the edge of the pond is the biggest frog the librarian has ever seen.I will deal with him later, but for now, please come with me. The chicken walks up to the frog, drops the book on the pond's edge, and says, "Book, Book, Book!